Super Smash Bros Ultra!
by Multusvalde
Summary: Super Smash Bros in real life. I get rid of all the fighter's origins and rewrite their history so they fit into the real world. (eg. Link is a Robin Hood-like knight from medieval times) Rated T for violence.
1. Chapter 1

Somewhere in England, 1150 AD

It was deathly quiet. In the middle of the night. The soldiers were ready. The archers were ready. They were all waiting for Link's signal. Link looked at King Richard. He nodded. Link took a deep breath. "CHARGE!" The soldiers charged at the castle, shouting things like "For our king!" and "For England!" A group of soldiers, including Link, quickly sprinted to the drawbridge. Link pulled out his hook shot and shot at the bridge. Using the strength from his golden gauntlets, he proceeded to pull it down, and a loud crash was heard. All the soldiers then charged in the castle.

Link cautiously wandered through the corridors in the castle, with three other knights. Suddenly, three arrows shot out of nowhere and went through the chests of the other knights, killing them. Link looked to see a bow floating and shooting by itself. Wait, what?

Suddenly the bow dropped to the ground. " I've been expecting you." a voice said. The figure walked out of the shadows. It was Ganondorf, evil sorcerer. "What have you done with Zelda?!" Link demanded. Zelda was the princess of England. She was the entire reason the knights had come to Ganondorf's castle. He had kidnapped her.

"You may not realise it, but you just fell into my trap boy!" Ganondorf smirked. Suddenly, a voice cried out. "LINK!" someone yelled. "Zelda?" Link looked around, and saw a cage in the corner, with the princess inside. "ZELDA!" While Link was distracted, Ganondorf took the opportunity to get the the first strike. Link went flying across the room. He shook it off though, and got right back up and pulled out the Mastersword: a blade so powerful it would beat Excalibur in a duel. Ganondorf took out his sword as well, and the two began sparring. Eventually, the two got into a deadlock. Ganondorf smirked, pulled out his free hand and began casting a spell. Using all his might, Link knocked Ganondorf's sword right out of his hand, and he jabbed Ganondorf. The mastersword went straight through Ganondorf's stomach. Ganondorf, yelled in agony, but then yelled "O, ye time rifts who wander, OPEN UP!" and he shot out a massive purple wave of dark energy, and Link, Zelda's cage ( with her still in it) and Ganondorf were no longer in the chamber...

Buckingham Palace, London, PRESENT DAY

"Toadsworth, when will those plumbers get here?" a very impatient Princess Peach asked. "Any minute, your majesty." Earlier that morning, a pipe had burst under Peach's sink in her bathroom, and the bathroom started flooding. In fact, there was water flowing into her bedroom that very minute. They were currently waiting in front of the gates, with about 25 bodyguards surrounding them.

Just then, a blue van pulled up with "Mario Bros. Plumbing" written on the side. "This must be them!" Toadsworth said. Two plumbers, one red and one green, jumped out of the van and headed towards them.

Just then, 5000 feet above the Buckingham Palace, a purple cloud started swirling. It then opened up, and two people and a cage dropped out. Link tried to get his sword back, but Ganondorf ripped it out of his stomach and threw it away. He then cast a healing spell on himself. "Choose, Link!" Ganondorf yelled before shooting off in another direction. Link pondered, "What does he mean "choose"? Choose from what? The only option I have is to go for my sword..." "LINK! HELP MEEEEEEEE!" Link looked down and saw Zelda plummeting down, still trapped in her cage. "Oh" Link thought. "So thats what he meant..." It was a no-brainer for Link. After all, he DID have a crush on Zelda.

He dove straight downwards towards the cage, and broke it open using his Megaton Hammer. Then Link used his cap like a parachute and told Zelda to use her dress in a similar fashion. He would find his sword later.

The two landed atop the Buckingham Palace. They leaned over to see how high they were, when Link saw something that nearly made him cry in hopelessness. Ganondorf had his Mastersword AND hostages. He held two unconscious men in his magical grip. Thousands of soldiers had guns pointed at him. But he just smirked, and teleported away.

Mario Mario and his brother, Luigi Mario, woke up in a jail cell. They couldn't remember much. They went to Buckingham Palace to fix Princess Peach's sink, but then some random guy knocked them out. Mario got up and, to his horror, saw the man that had knocked him out. "Greetings. I am Ganondorf. And you will be staying here. For the rest of your life. Here is some scrap metal and silk. You can make your own clothing out of it if you want to. They are the only things I'm giving you. Goodbye" And with that, he walked off. Mario just blinked. What just happened? He looked over at Luigi. They had to escape somehow. Both of them looked over at the scrap metal and silk. Maybe they could use it...

"But he's got hostages!" Link yelled at Toadsworth. The guards apparently thought that falling out of the sky out of a time rift was suspicious, and they were taking Link and Zelda to the prison cells. "Wait" a voice called. The guards stopped, turned around and knelt. Princess Peach walked towards them. "Who are you guys?" she asked. "Who are YOU?" Link retaliated. "Don't you know? I am the one and only Princess Peach" Link stared at her. "Princess Peach? Never heard of you" Link said. " Never heard of me? Where are you guys from?" she asked. "England" Zelda said. "Hmmmm... You say your from England, yet you've never heard of me. And you just appeared from a portal in the sky. Take them into the dungeons!" she said. Link was not too happy about this. He started squirming, and tried to get the ropes they tied on them off. Zelda followed suit, but one guard told her to stop, and then proceeded to push her to the ground. "Hey! Do you think thats a good way to treat royalty? This is Princess Zelda you morons!" Link yelled. Peach stopped walking away. She turned her head slightly. " Who did you say she was?" she asked. " She is Princess Zelda. Princess of England! Now let. Us. GO!" he yelled. Peach told the guards to stop and to untie their ropes. "Come with me" she said.

Mario and Luigi were well known in their neighbourhood not just for plumbing, but for building and inventing as well. They had created various inventions before, such as spring boots ( which they were wearing still), mushroom-powered go-karts and even edible flowers. The two were currently using the metal and silk to make power gloves. Mario had created blueprints for them the previous year, and they were using their minds to try and rebuild it. Mario finished one glove, and tried it on. He then pressed a button on the glove. Mini-flame throwers popped out of each finger and summoned a fireball. "Ok. Lets try and replace the buttons-a with something that-a will be-a more convineint-a!" he said enthusiastically to his brother.

NASA base, USA, PRESENT DAY

"Lift-off in..."

Samus Aran, astronaut for NASA, gripped the edge of her seat.

"10"

"9"

"8"

"7"

"6"

"5"

"4"

"3"

"2"

"1"

"0"

The rocket, named the Metroid 01, shot up into the air and started heading towards Mars to see if it could support life. She was to be the first person to ever walk on the moon.

"We have lift-off!" everyone in the NASA lab cheered and hi-fived each other.

Some Experiment labs, PRESENT DAY

" Dimension transporter test No.1. Test subject, Mr. Arnold Game&Watch. Beginning in 3,2,1."

A scientist pulled three levers and pressed a couple hundred buttons. Electricity started flowing into the gateway, where Mr. Game&Watch stood, strapped into a chair. The plan was to send him to the dimension next to our's, have him take photos and come back. Suddenly, a loud crash was heard, and Ganondorf walked into the lab. "Unstrap him! I shall be the test subject!". A guard tried to stop him, but Ganondorf just punched him away, and guard landed on top of some of the machinary. Sparks started flying everywhere, and pure energy shot out of the gateway and struck the nearest person, which was Mr. Arnold Game&Watch. Mr. Game&Watch then felt a very strange sensation. It felt as if he was being crushed, but at the same time, he had all the space in the world.

"I don't believe you" Peach said. Link burrowed his face into his palms, while Zelda tried to explain her story yet again. "Yeah, whatever. Without proof, I'm not believing you." Zelda took out her crown, which she never really wore. She showed it to Peach. Peach looked to her left, expecting to see Toadsworth there. He wasn't there, but she did see a painting, labeled:

Princess Zelda

1100-1195

She turned back towards the other two, and she had a very shocked look on her face.

Sacred Realm, PRESENT DAY

The Golden Triforce stood atop a cliff, sitting patiently, waiting for it's discoverer to find it and wish upon it. Suddenly, a white mist appeared and opened up, revealing a scene showing an angry man pushing over a guy in a lab coat. Suddenly, the Triforce got sucked into the portal, and the portal closed.

Ganondorf walked towards the portal. He stood in front of it, and the Triforce came out. Just as Ganondorf was about to touch it, a person crashed threw the window and kicked Ganondorf in the face. He tried to get up again, but the figure pushed Ganondorf out the window. He landed on the ground hard. The attacker jumped out of the window and landed on top him. Ganondorf kicked him off. Ganondorf got up, and his opponent got up as well. "You've got nerve to fight me" Ganondorf said. "All a part of being a CIA agent" he said. Ganondorf smirked, and used Warlock Punch on his face. The agent screamed in pain. Then he said (to his earpiece) "Looks like he can use magic. I gonna need some back-up!" At that exact moment, a blue flash, well, flashed and a blue robot stood where it flashed. "Good to see you Rock-unit-001" he welcomed. "For pete's sake Snake! Just call me Mega Man!" he said. Mega Man started shooting his Megabuster rapidly at Ganondorf. Ganondorf howled in pain, but shook it of and fired a ball of pure dark energy at Mega Man. However, Mega Man simply activated Leaf Shield and the attack simply bounced off the botanical shield. Ganondorf sprinted towards Mega Man and grabbed him by the neck. He then applied pressure. Mega Man laughed though, and said "That won't do anything to me". "Ok" Ganondorf said. "Will this?". He then proceeded to smash Mega Man to the ground and rapidly punch him with dark energy. Snake jumped on to his back. But Ganondorf simply grabbed him and lifted him off the ground whilst chocking him. Mega Man was stuck under his foot. "Who's gonna help you now?" Ganondorf taunted. "I am!" a voice called. "And so am I!" another voice called. They revealed themselves as

Mr. Game&Watch and the Robotic Operating Buddy, also known as R.O.B. ROB fired a laser at Ganondorf. It didn't damage him, but he flinched just enough for Mega Man to get out from under his foot and slice him with his Flame Sword. This freed Snake. The four formed a group against the villainous Ganondorf.

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I'll just let you now that I typed this up on my iPod, and published it from my iPod. Please R&R. And no, I haven't abandoned my Zelda story. I'm just having SEVERE writers block.


	2. Chapter 2

**Wow! That review was awesome! Thank you so much Bob Jones! Anyway, since this got a good review, I'm going to continue it. Enjoy this chapter!**

XXXX

The flight to Mars was exciting at first, but it started to get very boring. Samus wished she could've brought her pet cat with her, but NASA told her that they would choose the animals that would go with her. And for some reason, the chose a fox, a falcon and a wolf. Not the smartest of choices, considering that she had just locked up the wolf in the toilet.

Mario and Luigi were creeping through the hallways of Ganondorf's base, with their new Power Gloves on. Suddenly they heard a person speaking, coming from behind the door ahead of them. They nodded to each other, then they leaped at the door...

K.O.O.P.A secret base, PRESENT DAY

"The serums are ready sir" a lab worker said to his boss, Bowser von Koopa. He was trying to come up with a serum that could turn anything into a mutant. "This took too long Red!" he yelled at the scientist, now revealed to be called Red. "But show me anyway..." he mumbled. The two walked into a lab. In the centre was a big capsule, with a hedgehog strapped into it. "Activate it" Bowser simply said. Red turned a big wheel, and flicked a couple of switches, inserted his key card, and pressed the big red button.

The Mario bros. Came busting through the door, and found a fat man voice chatting. He immediately switched it off. "Well, I didn't expect you guys to get out of that cell. Nonetheless, the experiment can still go on." He said. Suddenly, goons jumped out of nowhere and grabbed the brothers. They were outnumbered.

The four heroes, Mega Man, Snake, Mr. Game&Watch and ROB began firing their respective projectiles, but Ganondorf simply teleported away again. "Coward" Snake said. "Dahm. We were so close" Mega Man said. "So Arnold. Why are you flat all of a sudden?" Snake asked. "Must've been that guy messing with the experiment. Not all bad news though. I can use hammer space baby!" he yelled, then proceeded to pull a chair out of nowhere and ditch at the wall. "Hey, that's pretty nifty. Care to join the secret service?" Snake asked. "Snake! You can't just go around wily-nily asking people to join the secret service!" Mega Man yelled. "Calm down Rock." Said a voice that only Snake, ROB and Mega Man could here (earpieces). "He could actually make a pretty good and valuable agent" the voice said. "Princess, are you sure it's a good idea?" Mega Man questioned Princess Peach, who just happened to be in charge of the secret service for some odd reason. "Yes. In fact, that isn't just a request. That's an order. Mr Arnold Game&Watch has permission to join her majesty's secret service".

"Test no. 1. Mutant serum. Test animal: hedgehog. Serum no. 05678329". Red then pulled a big lever, and big needles sprung to life and injected it's serum into the hedgehog's body. A loud humming noise was heard as the capsule started spinning rapidly. A blinding light flashed, and then the humming noise died, the capsule stopped spinning and everyone took off their safety glasses to see the results. There was a blue hedgehog in there, but now it sported white gloves, red shoes with gold buckles, and had a human structure, but still had spikes on the back of its head. It also had huge, closed eyes. The scientists began to slowly walk towards the hedgehog. Suddenly, its eyes opened. It broke out of the capsule and sprinted off, really, REALLY quickly. However, it ran straight into a wall, and the scientists, picked it up and threw it into a cell. "The results were good, sir. Its just the animal itself that was the problem." Red explained. "Really?" Bowser asked. "Then put ME into the capsule! I want some powers!" he yelled. Bowser had noticed the hedgehog's new speed. Red thought it was a really bad idea, but the last time someone had disobeyed Bowser, well, they didn't live to tell the tale. "This way sir" Red said.

XXXX

**It's going to take a while to actually start the story, but for the meanwhile enjoy the fighter's new origins! It's taking me quite a bit of thought to come up with these, so please no flames! R&R, and enjoy!**


	3. Chapter 3

Hello everyone! Yes, I'm still alive.

Thank you guys for the kind reviews!

Ok, so I'm using a different format of writing now.

XXXX marks the start and end of the actual chapter.

- marks a page break.

(Kinda hard typing on an iPod init?)

XXXX

Bowser's transformation did not go well. He basically became what looked like a mutant turtle, but he could breathe fire. Bowser was happy enough with his new abilities. He never cared about looks anyway. He had ordered his right hand man, Red, to start mass producing these mutants for his army. So far they had

a super-speed hedgehog which they named Sonic. A mutant mouse that gained electric abilities, which they called Pikachu. Jigglypuff, a singing mutant balloon (they tried it on in-animate objects). Pichu, another electric mouse. Mewtwo, a telekinetic cat-thing. Lucario, an aura wielding dog. Squirtle, a water like turtle-thing. Ivysaur, a mini cat with a flower on it's back. Greninja, a

ninja water frog. And Bowser's favourite: Charizard. Originally a blob of lava, Charizard became a sort of dragon thing.

However, Bowser began running out of cells. Red began working on a sort of device that fit in your pocket but could fit one of the monsters in.

Mario woke up in a lab. He was strapped down into a chair, and he was surrounded by needles. A fat man walked up in front of him.

"You have some guts fellow" he said.

"I like that. And so does my boss".

"Get to the point" Mario said bitterly.

"We admire your intellect. And would like to use it for our own intentions".

"OVER MY DEAD BODY!" Mario yelled.

"I was hoping you would say that" Wario said with an evil grin.

He flicked a switch, and Mario blacked out again.

"Where do you think he is?" Link asked Zelda.

"Can you sense him?"

"I'm getting a faint signal" she said.

"From... Oh no."

"What is it Zeldie?" Peach ran in and gave her an annoying new nickname.

"Ganondorf is on a different continent! The Great Southern Land?!"

"You mean Australia? I forgot you were from the past. Big mystery that place was back then, wasn't it?"

"Austril-wha?"

"I'll organize tickets right away! I'll also send some secret service agents with you." Peach said quickly.

"We have touchdown!".

Everyone on the Mars mission cheered. They had made it to Mars! Samus took the first step on the barren planet. Followed by... A fox, a wolf and a falcon (the person who selected these animals was drunk at the time, it turns out). Just then, the wolf attacked the fox... Again. They managed to drag the falcon into the fight as well. Then, the fox ripped the space helmet of the wolf...

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Sorry for the huge wait. I just want to know: would you rather constant updates on my Zelda story or this story? Let me know in the reviews! It'll be majority rules. Voting will end at no specific time on 14/7/2014. I'll still update tomorrow.

Catch you later!


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